CRITIQUE NO. 1
The Toothbrush-of-the-Month Club is a terrible, terrible idea.
Response: I hear this objection a lot. I take it seriously, because I believe it gets right to the heart of my proposal. However, contrary to this oft-articulated criticism, the Toothbrush-of-the-Month Club is not a terrible idea but rather quite a fine idea. Many dentists and other oral-health-care professionals recommend replacing your toothbrush every month, but most people don’t bother to do it. The Toothbrush-of-the-Month Club would capitalize on this nauseating phenomenon by sending the customer a brand-new toothbrush every month in return for a small annual fee. Both parties benefit. The customer no longer has to brush his or her teeth with a stinking, bacteria-infested instrument, and I get rich and can afford that heavy-duty flamethrower I’ve always wanted. Far from being terrible, my idea exemplifies the American dream. In this way, it is a bit like the comic strip For Better or For Worse, which also gives voice to our inner yearnings as Americans, although somewhat differently.
FBOFW is Canadian. Jesus.
UPDATE: A dissenting voice.
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[…] head throughout, thinking, my toothbrush is stanky, I could totally use a toothbrush-a-month.Well, this hater just doesn’t get it. OF COURSE, FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE IS CANADIAN! How else would they give voice […]
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